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Do people really believe this crap?

May 1, 2009

Do people actually believe any of the untruthful Microsoft commercials that are currently running on TV?

Microsoft is trying to claim in their ads that PCs are cheaper than Macs.

Oh, sure they are, in the same way that a porta-potty is cheaper than indoor plumbing. In the same way that a hooker is cheaper than a girlfriend. In the same way that drinking diet coke is cheaper than a fresh-squeezed juice. (I go into even more detail on the differences between Microsoft and Apple in my Steve Jobs vs. Steve Ballmer shootout.)

And then today, Microsoft puts out this duplicitous ad:

Hahahahahahaaa!!!!!!! OMG, I AM ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!

Riiiiiiiiiiiight!!!!!!!!!!!

Like ANY human being on the face of the planet (that we are destroying) would **EVER** choose a PC for VIDEO EDITING!!!!!! Hahahahaha!!! OMG, this isn’t even close to the reality of the real world, where the ONLY effective video editing platform is the Mac.

Video editing is what people from around the world, in all cultures & nations, flock to the Mac for.

Of the many problems with the ad — such as the fact that she chooses a machine with a slower processor than the Mac, a machine that is heavier & bulkier than the Mac, a machine that has an inferior video display resolution than the Mac (um, hello?!? Wouldn’t that be slightly important for video editing?!?) — I also love how she scoffs at the idea of “2 GB of RAM” as if she even has ANY CLUE what that means.

Not only is the Mac’s RAM FASTER THAN THE PC’S RAM, but also the Mac handles 2 GB of RAM much more efficiently than a PC can even handle 4 TIMES THAT AMOUNT. The ad also conveniently forgets to mention that you can upgrade your Mac’s already-faster and already-more-efficient RAM for under $50 and dropping.

Plus, the computer she chooses doesn’t even have ANYWHERE CLOSE to the same specs as a Mac of the same price!

Not to mention the fact that when you ACTUALLY TRY to edit videos on a Windows machine, you’re going to be sorely disappointed when it SIMPLY DOESN’T WORK.

And, of course, the biggest disadvantage of all: The PC runs Windows. And has viruses. And crashes. And unintuitiveness. And problems.

Look, if Bill Gates himself can’t figure out Windows, how in the hell do you think YOU’RE going to figure out Windows? And here’s a video clip of Bill Gates with something else you might want to hear.

Meanwhile, the Mac runs the superior Mac OS X. With no viruses. And no crashes. And an uncluttered intuitive interface. And award-winning programs that ship with the Mac for free. Such as the outstanding video-editing program known as iMovie. (Oh yeah, and the Mac can run Windows too, if you’re really desperate. You know, desperate in the sense of dehydrating in the desert and you see some urine on the ground that you use to try to quench your thirst.)

As our buddies at MacDailyNews said today:

Any real filmmaker understands what Final Cut is and that it only runs on Apple Macs with an efficient OS that doesn’t require massive amounts of RAM to “cut video” or do most anything that an aspiring soccer mom like Sheila can throw at it. Like kibitzing on Facebook for 8+ hours a day. This spot is just too unrealistic. In real life, actual filmmakers simply wouldn’t be stupid enough to limit themselves to a heavy, thick, OS-limited hunk o’ junk PC. Real filmmakers use Apple Macs.

Hell, even FAKE filmmakers use Apple Macs.

There’s a great discussion going on here about the multiple lies told (and truths obscured) in this ad.

This ad is really puzzling. I have no idea why Microsoft is suddenly trying to fight Apple on Apple’s turf now. Video editing is what Apple is known for.

And computers priced over $1,000 is Apple’s definite home-field advantage. Computers priced over $1,000 is where Apple dominates the marketplace. A study from 2008 showed that Apple owned over 66% (and growing) of the marketshare for computers priced over $1,000.

Hmmm… that’s a far cry from the phony “under 10%” Mac marketshare you hear thrown about by PC manufacturers all the time.

Plus, even if Windows machines WERE less expensive WITH THE SAME SPECS as a Mac (which is not true; Windows with the same specs as a Mac are MORE EXPENSIVE than a Mac), you still have to pay “The Windows Tax”.

My great friend Aaron Schacht of Canyon Computer Services in Boulder, Colorado did a very nice calculation of this “Windows Tax” for us. Just so you know, Aaron is both a Microsoft Certified Support Engineer (i.e. Windows) and a Mac consultant as well, so he knows what he’s talking about:

What is the REAL COST of a $1,700 17″ HP Notebook?

+ $500 for immediate productivity loss (first month alone)
+ $200 for lack of software (iLife, etc) that comes with a Mac
+ $300 to account for shitty LCD screen
+ $200 to account for flimsy plastic design
+ $100 for virus/spyware protection (the first year)
+ $200 for service and support (likely due to Windows, esp. Vista being pure shit)
+ $500 for longevity

True Windows laptop cost (in the first month alone): $3,700

And that price CONTINUES TO RISE on a monthly basis when you own a PC. The longer you own a PC, the more money & time you’re going to be sinking into it. And then, guess what? Your PC dies 5 years earlier than the equivalent Mac dies.

So what is REALLY GOING ON HERE?

The real point here is that Microsoft is using these ads to try to peddle crappy products to an uneducated populace, who are not going to research the false claims made in this ad. The same uneducated populace who only looks at one thing when making important life decisions, such as what they put into their bodies and what they entrust their important data on: PRICE. And yet, Microsoft loses on price as well. They are blatantly manipulating & skewing the ads to try to give themselves some sort of a price advantage, when they actually have none!

Anyone still want to buy a PC? Because I’m just getting warmed up here. 🙂

May 16, 2009 Update:

Microsoft is back at it again, with their 5th ad in the series. But this time they are really delving into the illegal and immoral “false advertising” zone here:

As AppleInsider correctly states:

Once again, however, the ad relies on conscious misdirection to make the PC seem more appealing. Although the ad shows Lauren trying a 13-inch MacBook, it quotes her and her mother Sue complaining about the $2,000 price of the 15-inch MacBook Pro — not only falling out of the size category the two had been considering but falsely portraying Macs as twice as expensive when Apple already offers a $999, if somewhat slower, MacBook. Even Apple’s fastest aluminum MacBook would have fallen within Lauren’s budget and saved her $500 over the price quoted in the ad.

So I’m very pleased to announce that Apple has struck back with a few truthful ads of their own. Here’s just 2 of their recents ads, but Apple has dozens more on their “Get A Mac” website:

Elimination:

PC Choice Chat:

Customer Care:

Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. May 1, 2009 11:42 AM

    HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAAAAAAAA!!!!

    Omg- they really went too far if you had to bring in urine drinking. And yet, urine it is.

    I love the moment at about :36 in when the salesman reacts to her question “Is this Graphics Card gonna be… powerful?”

    He doesn’t look at her, he’s attempting to swallow his own lips, and in a high voice he squeaks “Mm Hmm?”

    That’s the face guys make when they are covered in lipstick and get home too late, and their wife asks, half asleep, “Did you get that project done?” “Mm Hmm?”

    I feel kinda bad for that guy, he looks like he’s not psyched to be part of this ad. He looks like I would look if that was my life and I absolutely had to participate in something like this. I wouldn’t be surprised if down the road he’s one of the thousands of Windows employees who turn around and say something nasty about MS – something like “Ok, look it was really shitty to do that to me because I can’t afford to say no, and now I’m suddenly the asshole in the commercial who’s helping to say that MS is a good video editing platform. Oh, and by the way I watched them edit the commercial and it was on Final Cut Pro.”

    There always seems to someone catching MS making their print and television ads on Macs.

    As to the RAM issue, I just can’t believe MS would go there. Vista arbitrarily uses twice the RAM as XP, for stupid reasons. I don’t want to go into heavy detail about the ‘why’ but if you buy a piece of software these days, they now have TWO sets of “MINIMIMUM REQUIREMENTS” – this is minimum now – for a typical video game, the XP minimum requirement will be 1 GB of RAM – and for the Vista user it jumps to an astonishing 2 GB of RAM! Just because you jumped to Vista your requirements doubled. Which is amazing.

    Most people are looking to keep costs and even the time spent on upgrades to a minimum. It is one thing to have technology change in such a way where the applications themselves, or the videos streaming on the internet themselves, change to the point where we need more memory.

    It is another to have to DOUBLE your memory just because you went with Vista. No other reason – you went with Vista, so now you pay $200 instead of $100.

    The amount you can do hasn’t changed: only the amount you need to make your computer work.

    On the other hand the Mac line works solidly, silently, spectacularly, with “less RAM” which we know is bullshit anyway since they are pretending all RAM is alike, which it isn’t.

    This post was hilarious Scott, nice work!

    When I give those minimum requirements, by the way – I’M NOT EXAGGERATING. Today’s minimum requirements for the fastest video games – this is minimum – are 1 GB for XP and 2 GB for the Vista. PC users largely need to play video games, and they love the ease with which they can get into a PC’s guts and pull things apart to make the machine work harder than it should to “overclock” it. This allows their machine to be faster than their opponent’s.

    When I saw that Vista had jumped to 2 GB minimally for the newest games, I knew that meant that 2 GB would make the game run slowly, choppy. I knew – this is from experience – that the reality is there’s a “Minimum” and a “Recommended” – and that most of these games would easily “Recommend” (I put it in quotes because from experience it means “Demand”) that you upgrade immediately to 4GB. So now I’m up to 4GB just so that I can shoot cartoons through the face.

    Mind you, I was never able to figure out how to do upgrades on a PC, I’m just not that smart. I couldn’t master the order of things, and I was always frightened by having to ground myself electrically to something or eternity would collapse.

    When I switched to a Mac we upgraded from 2GB to 4GB in something like 90 seconds – Scott pulled out ONE SCREW and while I was talking his ear off – he wasn’t even looking at the machine – the memory was doubled and the cover was back in place. I think the extra memory may have cost me $50. Something like that? $60? $70? I can’t remember.

    I guess one “truth” I have to tell here is that Macs don’t have what I would consider a ‘full’ lineup of video games available. No, for that I have to buy the overpriced copy of XP, run it on my Mac better than it runs on PC, and then I have both worlds available. So, even though I’m living in outrageous opulence on the Mac, if I just have that craving for urine, I can always run XP or even Vista on my Mac. Mac will now let you drink urine!

    Ugh. That joke is going to make me vomit.

    Anyway I’m off of video games as it is, at least the ‘need’ to play them, the need to shoot things in the face. But if I want to, it is there. Which really is a mark against MS as a bad software company. They really don’t do what they do very well. Which brings me to the line of the night on the AppleInsider article:

    “… can be seen below, ends before Sheila can begin her search for a viable video editing application to cut her video”

    Right. Of course. What video editor isn’t using Final Cut?

    Also, thanks for the link to the article on PCs priced over $1000. I just want to say on that: “AH HA!” I just knew it. I knew that “10%” stuff was a lie. So – officially – in areas which Mac competes, they are killing the competition. In areas in which Apple does NOT compete, they aren’t. Ok. Good. Thanks.

    AH HA!

    Great post Scott.

  2. May 6, 2009 10:38 PM

    Ohmygod, that is so funny, I didn’t even catch that salesperson’s reaction the first time I watched the ad!! Holy shit, you totally pointed out something HILARIOUS — how MANY TIMES in your life have you been the recipient of a nod like that from a salesman? The guy doesn’t know what he’s talking about, he just wants the customer to shut up so he can make the sale. He’ll nod his head yes to ANYTHING.

    Plus, I just realized — Microsoft’s marketing tagline for Windows is “Life Without Walls”. Ummm, okay… but if there were no walls, then where would you put your windows? Do you really want a world without walls, Microsoft? Because as far as I can see it, a world without walls looks a lot like nature outdoors, and I don’t see any windows hanging in the redwood forest.

    Anyways, thanks for your comments. Hilarious and insightful, as always.

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